Naked Men Talking: Ray Mannix
We talk finding a connection, emotional intimacy, and why Andorra is at the top of his travel itinerary.
For our podcast, Naked Men Talking, I caught up with content-creator Ray Mannix.
In the conversation we talk finding a connection, emotional intimacy, and why Andorra is at the top of his travel itinerary.
What brings you to London?
DJing. I'm here to study DJing - that's the main reason.
The DJing is a new thing? I interviewed you just before the Grabbys - you said that DJing more was on your list of things to do?
I started last year but with my work I didn't have time to do it fully. Now, I'm finishing the courses and I'm preparing for my first club gig here in London.
Why DJing?
I love music. A few years ago, I started loving techno. I like to I like to learn new things, so why not?
When you think of that first club gig and playing music to a crowd, what sort of feeling do you want them to have when they're listening to the music you're playing?
I guess every DJ wants the journey for the listener, but it's not so easy.
I want them to feel like you start somewhere and you finish somewhere and you enjoy the night.
Travel is one of your passions - you travel a lot. Was there a specific trip or a moment where you realised, I'm going to need to do a lot more travelling?
As a child, every year we would drive to Croatia to go camping. When I was 17, I took my first flight - I flew by myself to Barcelona.
It didn't start well. Someone had stolen my ID and I didn't get the replacement in time, so I missed my flight.
But eventually, I flew to Barcelona - I went to see my boyfriend who was on Erasmus in Spain.
Everything that happens teaches you something.
From then, I just started travelling more and more - to see new cultures and new places. I want to visit every country in the world - life is too short.
I think I saw on your Twitter - you listed how many countries you'd visited. You're up to 90?
Ninety two. I'm hoping to hit over a hundred next year.
How would you describe your travel style?
I used to be more organised. When you travel often, you forget stuff - everyday things you don't think about. I've tried boarding the wrong flight, I've booked a flight on the wrong day. I don't pay as much attention as I used to.
Do you think that the more experience you have travelling, the more confident and relaxed you are that you'll figure it out?
I used to plan how to get from the airport to the city, Now, I don't even look. You always figure it out. There's always somebody who will help you.
Plus, we have the internet.
Do you have any destinations where you always enjoy returning to or are you constantly looking for new places and new experience?
There are places I definitely want to come back to but I prefer to explore new places.
I'm going to Andorra in September because this is the last country in Europe that I haven't been to. I'm just going for three days to check it out - it's been annoying me that this is the last country in Europe that I need to visit.
I'm going to Latin America in December for four months - backpacking. That will tick off a few more countries.
Are you always creating content when you're travelling? Are you approaching every trip planning to do some collaborations - is that the priority?
No. The priorities are my life and travelling - the content comes after that.
Last year, I was travelling in Asia for five weeks. I went there for travel. But twice while I was there, I met somebody who does OnlyFans and we filmed content together. It wasn't planned - I just saw somebody in a bar and I could see him on Grindr. I was there with people I had met three hours before and I got them to be my cameraman and to help me shoot the content. Sometimes it just happens.
For the South America trip, I'm planning to do some travel content. I want to start do travel content for YouTube. I want to show people the world, and show people affordable travel so they can experience life and the planet we live on.
South America has such great content-creation opportunities - you look at some of the scenes that come out of South America - they're amazing!
You mean the boys?
Yes!
I am planning to do some collaborations there. I'll be in Rio for about six weeks, so I'm looking forward to meeting some hung guys and filming some hot collabs.
You've said that looking good isn't just about going to the gym, that it's about feeling happy and enjoying your life. What's making you happy at the moment?
What's making me happy is being able to travel, to meet people, to experience different cultures.
There's people on the planet that can't afford to travel - not even to the capital of their own country. I realise that I'm one of the lucky ones.
When you're travelling all the time, it can be difficult to have a "normal" life?
You don't have a normal life, but you have friends all around the world. It can make you feel tired sometimes - constantly being on the move.
Does that sometimes get a bit lonely?
Sometimes, but you meet people when you're travelling.
You also need to be okay if you're just by yourself for a while.
You've said that your work in adult entertainment has helped you learn how to create boundaries between physical intimacy and emotional intimacy. How does that work for you?
Love is love and sex is sex. I wasn't able to separate it when I was 18 or 20, but I can now separate a relationship from the sex.
Whether I'm filming a scene or just having sex with other people, I don't see that as "cheating" - it's just sex.
You've also said that when you're filming a collaboration, what's important for you is to have a sense of connection with the person you're filming with. How do you establish that connection if you're separating physical intimacy and emotional intimacy?
There needs to be something between us. I look at his photos. If I'm attracted to him, I'll send him a message. If he doesn't reply, maybe he's not attracted to me or he didn't see my message. But if we chat and we both want to do the collaboration, then there is that connection - there is something between us.
You're in London for a couple of weeks - do you have a busy schedule planned in terms of collaborations?
I have three or four booked in, but maybe there will be more - I didn't want to fill my schedule too full. My priority here is studying music.
Looking to the future, what are your plans after London?
I'm about to launch my second calendar - I'm just choosing the photos. We shot it in Vienna this year - there's outdoor and indoor photos. Last year was Budapest.
You're very good at branding and thinking as an entrepreneur - it's not as transactional as sometimes people get with this kind of work?
I want people follow me and to see my life. I don't need to them to subscribe to my paid OnlyFans - they can see my music on SoundCloud, they can see my Instagram.
My goal is not to have million subscribers on paid OnlyFans. I love to create music, I love to create other things - these things can also create income.
I'm also doing my motorbike licence. When I travel, I've been riding motorbikes without a licence, so I want to be legal.
I'm also doing a sky-dive in September.
I also have to pack up my home - I'm moving out of my apartment and backpacking for the next one or two years.
You're going full digital nomad?
Yes, from December. South America, then back to Europe for the summer, then Africa.
Let's see how many months I can last.
Gareth Johnson