Grabbys Spotlight: RSsecurityX
Targeting trophies in Torremolinos.
As we count down towards the Grabby Awards in Torremolinos, we caught up with RSsecurityX.
Gareth Johnson
Based in Lyon, RSsecurityX is nominated in four categories:
- Newcomer of the Year
- Best Top
- Creator of the Year
- Actor of the Year
You've said that winning a Grabby Award would be important to you because it would encourage you to move forward in the adult entertainment industry - how did you discover and start to explore that performing on camera and content creation was something that you're passionate about?
I first found myself in front of a camera during the Covid pandemic. At the time, I was working as an ambulance paramedic - in the middle of chaos, fear, and uncertainty. I had to do short, live TV segments using my phone - without really realising it, something shifted in me.
In the middle of a world that felt heavy and overwhelming, the camera became more than just a tool — it became a space. A space where I could breathe. A creative refuge during a period when I wasn’t feeling my best internally.
Later, in Barcelona, everything took a more unexpected turn. I randomly met someone who is now a close friend, Andolini XXL. He was supposed to shoot that day, but his boyfriend Guillaume couldn’t be there. So I stepped in to help and started filming for him.
What I didn’t expect was how natural it would feel. Behind the camera, I felt present, alive, connected. It awakened something playful in me — a slightly exhibitionist, mischievous energy — but also something much deeper: the joy of creating, shaping an atmosphere, telling a story through images. Even the editing process felt intimate and powerful.
Those moments in Barcelona remain very beautiful memories for me. That’s when I understood that this wasn’t just curiosity. It was expression. It was freedom. And in many ways, it was healing.
Do you consider yourself an exhibitionist?
I do consider myself a little bit of an exhibitionist — saying otherwise would be dishonest. But always within reason, within a space that feels chosen and controlled, never reckless.
That attraction to being seen didn’t start with my career in the industry. Long before that, when I was working as an ambulance paramedic, I already had a mischievous side. I have to confess - there were certain rest-stops during shifts that held a particular kind of thrill for me.
It wasn’t just about being provocative. It was about feeling alive. The adrenaline. The electricity of a glance. That delicate line between what is visible and what is almost forbidden. There’s something deeply human about the desire to be seen — not just physically, but energetically.
Over time, I realised my exhibitionist side wasn’t just a naughty trait. It was a form of expression. A way of embracing my sensuality without shame and transforming that energy into something creative, almost artistic.
Today, I own it. Yes, that part of me exists. But it’s conscious, intentional, and controlled — and that’s exactly what makes it powerful.
What was your relationship with your body like when you were growing up?
I’ve had a very complicated and painful relationship with my body.
Growing up, I was heavily bullied because of the way I looked. I was a bit bigger, a bit different, and late in my hormonal development. I felt like an outsider — like I didn’t fit anywhere.
Some of what I experienced was violent. I was harassed, humiliated, even physically attacked. My hair was burned. My back was burned. My body, for a long time, felt like my worst enemy.
It became a source of shame instead of pride. Instead of feeling at home in it, I felt trapped in it.
Even today, being fully nude on camera can be very difficult for me. Sometimes it still feels impossible.
But working in this industry has forced me to confront that pain. Slowly, it has helped me reclaim parts of myself. Not perfectly, not completely — but honestly.
And maybe that’s the real journey for me - learning that the body I once hated is also the body that carries my strength.
How has your work in the adult entertainment industry changed your relationship with your body and the way that you experience intimacy?
Working in the adult entertainment industry has been a real challenge for me, but also a form of liberation.
Even though I never perform fully nude, I’ve learned to face some of my fears and to slowly re-learn how to look at my body with a bit more kindness. The camera has allowed me to transform that anxiety into creativity. Every scene, every shoot becomes a way to explore my image, to play with my energy and sensuality, all while staying in control of what I choose to show.
I’ve discovered that intimacy isn’t just about nudity or the body. It’s about trust, about the joy of connecting with yourself and others, about the freedom to dare to be yourself, to express your desire and allure.
Today, even though some barriers remain, I can feel the power and beauty in what I choose to reveal. Maybe one day, with time and confidence, I’ll be able to take it a step further and perform fully nude. It’s not the moment yet, but I hold onto hope.
Beyond the Grabby Awards, what else is on your vision-board for the months ahead?
Some time ago, I organised my mother’s very first surprise trip — she’s in a wheelchair — and seeing her smile, sharing those moments with her, was incredibly moving. This year, I want to do it again and create more unforgettable memories together.
At the same time, I’m working on a deeply personal music project. I want to express my past experiences through it - my divorce, but especially the school bullying I endured, which has become a cause very close to my heart. Through this music, I want to transform past pain and wounds into something powerful, authentic, and hopefully something that resonates with others who have faced similar struggles.
It’s a mix of healing, creativity, and sharing. This project is my way of turning my experiences, my struggles, and my emotions into something meaningful and beautiful.
Voting for the Grabby Awards is now open.
Gareth Johnson
